We all know I love a good rant when I've deprived myself of sleep for no reason, so here goes:
This is something that has always bothered me, but I never knew how to talk about it without feeling like a jerk or that people would just think I'm fishing for compliments or something. But lately I've come to the conclusion that some things need to be said and that I need to stop being afraid to say them. That doesn't mean I'm right, it doesn't mean that I don't want to hear anyone else's opinion. It just means I want to openly share mine.
First, I want to say how awesome it is that so many women are aware of the unrealistic standards of weight that media has shown us, and I'm so happy that women are not looking to those false ideas to find beauty. But, it seems that we've almost swung the other way in some regards.
Hear me out: Women today have gotten so on board the "love your curves" train that many women who are naturally thin are feeling guilty for something that they can't help. Obviously, this is kind of a blanket statement to make; so, although I cannot speak for other women, I can speak for myself.
I have always felt incredibly uncomfortable when someone pointed out my weight (or lack thereof). I've been skinny since I was a child and I've had to deal with the problems that come along with it since. In fifth grade a girl asked if I was anorexic, I didn't know what it meant and after unassuredly guessing "no," I went home and asked my mom what it was. People have always commented on my weight: from family members to strangers, and the uncomfortable feeling that accompanies it has never gone away.
What I'm trying to get at here is this: I love that women with curves or heavier women are liberating themselves of what society thinks they should look like. But, just because I'm a size 0 does not mean that I have it easy, and it doesn't make me a bad person. Suddenly, we've come into this age where the mantra "Be comfortable in whatever body you have," it's translated to mean, "Love your curves, mock those who are skinny." It's no longer about being healthy and loving yourself, instead, it becomes about what's it's been since the beginning: Don't care about how you feel about your body, care about what others think about it. Again, it's awesome that women want to feel that love for themselves, no matter what size. Just be careful about what kind of language you use to express that love you are striving to have for your body. Sometimes the things people say to make them love themselves for being bigger, might also just be the things that hurt those who are smaller.
Look at it this way: I want curves. I don't like it when my clothes don't fit (including my wedding dress) because I'm too damn skinny. So, why would you make me feel worse about myself by letting me know that I'm not sexy, remotely attractive, or what a "real woman" looks like? How is that helping women? How is that any different from scorning those who do have curves? It's not.
Next time you see a skinny girl, don't just assume that she has the greatest life, don't assume that she doesn't have issues with her body; instead, see her as a person who is in need of love and reassurance just like everyone else. In the end, it doesn't matter if you're a size 00 or 100, I care more about who you are than what you look like.
